Friday, February 28, 2014

No Organ is Safe!

Today was comical looking back now, felt a little like a Seinfeld episode.  I'll explain.....

All I knew from all the phones calls back and forth of trying to get me in to get this neck biopsy was that I finally had an apt. at 7:30 am at RiverBend on the 3rd floor.  (It didn't occur to me to ask anymore questions) So this morning Ryan and I arrive at Riverbend's N.W. Specialty clinics building right at 7:30 and go up to the 3rd floor only to find it dark and empty!  We scurry around to find someone with no luck, so we survey the building directory to see if the Dr's name would ring a bell......nope....but it seems like the 4th floor would be a good try.  (because they had a pathology suite) Up the elevator we go, with the same results, dark & empty!! Now I'm starting to panic a little, so our next mission is to find any living person that works there to ask.....we run into a few behind the desk after some searching but no one see my name under their patient list. Finally we decide to try the Pavilion building, thankfully there were more signs of life here, so we made our way to the 3rd floor, but ran into the same dead-end.  However this receptionist suggestion we try the 3rd floor of the actual hospital because they have a surgery department there.  So off we go, walking fast and both of us are a little frustrated and irritable (well maybe it was just me that was irritalbe)  The receptionist again didn't see us on her list-but behold an angel-she took my info and said she would work on it and find out where I belong!!  After 7min, she let us know we needed to be in the main hospital, 1st floor to the imaging center.

  Feeling relieved we finally at the right place, we rush down there, mind we are now 30min late.   We got checked in, where she informed me I would be admitted into the hospital for this biopsy.....what?! I thought it was going to be a in-an-out type thing, so I know had to mental prepare for this now-somewhat of a big deal biospy.  So I get a room, change into the gown per the nurses instructions and them the Doctor walks in and says "Change of plans, were going to have you go to the NW Speciality clinics building to do this instead, so put your clothes back on and we'll make sure you are seen soon"     WHAT???!!!!  Ummmmmm.......What?  At this point all my frustration and emotions were boiling over and broke down-right there in front of the doctor, demanding that I must be seen asap-(because remember I can't take my blood thinner meds until I have this biopsy)   So the Dr. and nurse step out for a moment, them they come back in an let me know my apt. is at 10:30 (which was 2hrs away) and they he offered me a Valium to take the "edge" off. haha. Yes, i will take that please!

So 10:30 comes, Ryan and I check in and the Dr. proceeds with the biopsy.  The lymph node was pretty small, so it was hard for him to find.  Once he did find it, he explained he'll take a sample them look at it under the microscope and if need be, take another sample.  He also explained he tells his patients   what he finds (Which is nice a rare) Well he ended up taking 4 samples!! and this isn't the  most pleasant thing in the world, as Ryan put it,  "he put a long needle in and them jackhammered it" Which really means, with the hollow needle he needs to make sure and collect enough to get results, so yes he moved it up and down and around vigorously.   After all four samples, he let me know that he did see the abnormal cells in my lymph, but could not tell if they were cancer yet, he'd need to run a few more tests.  I'm sure on my next big apt. on the 4th Dr. Winter will discuss the results.

You'd think that would be the big adventure for the day huh?  Well, like the title "no organ  is safe" this was only the beginning.....

After the biopsy, i was extremely tired, I haven't got the best sleep last night.  So first thing to do when I got home was administer my first blood thinner dose (remember it's an injection....fun) then take a nap.  Ok, gave myself the shot (wont go into details about that) then got snuggled on the couch with the pups and had myself a wonderful nap!   Ryan came home from work around 2:30 and woke me up (not on purpose, but the door opening and the dogs barking did the trick)  after being awake for 30 min. or so I notice my chest  feels tight.  But I thought I was because I had slept on my side, so didn't pay much attention to it....until it didn't go away and in fact got worse, it was hard to breath in deeply and I would cough/wheeze when I would breath out.  

 YIKES!! This is what Dr. Winter warned me about.....symptoms to be aware of if the blood clot moved into my lungs.  I called Dr. Winter to let him know my symptoms and he said get to the ER right away.  OK this is scary! Ryan and I jump in the car and fly to the ER, they take me in right away.  My chest pain, is now coming a going, sometime I feel no pain at all.  So the ER Dr. asks lots of questions and I explain to him the craziness of the past two days.  He was intrigued bout my neck biopsy I had just had done, he explained sometimes the needle can acciedentally puncture the lung because it's so close ( remember the "jack hammer?!")  And since my vital were pretty stable, he wanted to get a chest x-ray before he ran any test to scan my lung for a blood clot.  With in 20 min, the results were in.  My left lung is partially collapsed!  hahhaha,  seriously?! You may find it odd I laugh, but what else can you do, I mean really.....this is just nuts.  In all honestly, this was very scary situation and the best outcome is what happened-no blood clot in the lungs!  So now after all, I did get admitted into the hospital for overnight.  The Dr. said the puncture is very small and it should heal on it's own quickly.  He wants to keep me here overnight so that I can breath oxygen to help my lung heal.  He'll take a new x-ray in the morning.  

So no organ is safe!! Glad this had a happy ending, and here are some fun pictures :)  I had to sent Ryan home because he was making me laugh too much...which hurt really bad!


What I learned....

  1. This is a minor hiccup in the grand picture of things.  
  2. We are so blessed!  Both Ryan and I have been blown away from everyone's response to this,  it truly does make a difference.  Reading your FB posts, emails and texts makes us feel like were are not along in this....it makes us feel we have quite the army behind us...or rather in front- interceding for us on our behalf.  
  3. To be thankful.  I can thank The Lord for the answers to prayers, even when i don't see them yet. 
  4. Humor is the best medicine!!  Im so glad Ryan and I can laugh together even in the midst of all this....thank you Lord for Ryan.


Good night all!

It's hard to see....but it's partially collapsed I swear

My cool oxygen head gear and the blue circle bandaid is where they took the biopsy

This guy....no words can say enough.  





Disclaimer

Hey everyone,

This is my blog.  I want it to do 2 things.  First to keep you all informed medically, what the latest updates are, my progress and future plans.  Since things change so much, it's easier for me to type it all here one time for everyone to have access to.
Secondly, this will be my online "dairy" if you will.  It will be an outflow of feelings, fears, victories and prayers.  So I will not be checking it for grammar and or spelling errors all the time, so I apologize if this will bother you.
Please feel free to speak about anything that is on here with others, as I do not have the time to spread the word myself.  Ryan and I are requesting the help for as many prayer warriors as we can during this journey.

So if you not afraid of some poor grammar and some raw feelings, let's get real!

Blessings,
Amanda :)

Thursday, February 27, 2014

His Love > my fear

Feb. 27th

After several days of a strange pain in my leg and Ryan telling me "That's not normal, you need to call your doctor" I finally decided maybe I should call, not that i thought something was terribly wrong-but that they should know i am experiencing this new symptom.  (They meaning my Dr. Winter at Compass Oncology in Portland)  Well turns out i should of listened to Ryan a lot sooner (not the first time that's happened!)

The Dr. got me scheduled immediately for an ultra sound on my legs (this morning) and turns out I had several bi-lateral blood clots.  Dr. Winter called me soon after this to discuss with me what this means as well as results of the other previous tests that i had done these past few weeks.  (He was planning on telling me on the 4th, but with this new information he wanted to disclose everything)
On my pelvic MRI they found a 2cm tumor, I'm guessing attached to my cervix,  and on my PET CT Scan there were several area's that "lite" up.  They use this term "lite" up because they injected me with a low dose of radiation that sticks to any abnormal lymph nodes.  Well my cervix area was lite up pretty good and even going into my abdominal area.....there was even a lite up lymph on my neck!!


So what I learned today...

  1. Blood clots are serious, we don't want it to dislodge and move into my lungs!
  •  My activity levels need to be on the low side
  •  Bummer!! We had to cancel our fund trip we planned with friends to go snow tubing at             Mt.Bachelor  tomorrow.

2.  I am scared of this new path
  • I had prepared and come to terms with the path that my cervical cancer was taking me on (until this point)    The path of yes-I would have to have a hysterectomy and family planning would be a journey......I was at a point where I was ready to find joy in other couples cute belly bump photos on FB, I was ready to genuinely be happy for others when they announce their pregnancy, I was ready to open my heart to what "family" really meant;  I had a peace about this, and was ready to walk strong on that path The Lord called me to walk.  But now that path is very much overshadowed, and my only concern is making sure I live.....
  • Womanhood....funny term, but some women find great honor in it.  I could be ok with having my "womanhood" removed aka woman organs (because no one would see!)  but to have my womanhood start to fade away on the outside-whoa, that is scary to me.  (I'm talking about loosing my hair)  I know my value comes from within-but come'on what woman is excited about a bald head! And I don't look good in hats-ha....guess I'll try some wigs.   
3.  My doctors rock!
  • I've talked to Dr. Winter personally multiple times today, he was working hard to get things figured out and moving fast. He brought on-board Dr. Garrett (my original doctor from my first cone biopsy back in July-she is here in Eugene)  With whom I have also talked with multiple times today, she rattled some cages trying to get me in for that biopsy on my neck today, but turns out it'll be first thing tomorrow morning.  
4.  I have a family that is loving, supportive and their willingness to help is overwhelming.
  • Since I am from Washington, i don't have family close by.  But it has been amazing to have them offer to drive down here if i asked.  I know they are fully capable of lifting me up in prayers, in spirits, and even for some good laughs.
  • My UFC (that's University Fellowship Church-where i attend and work) family has also been there for me every step of the way!  I know they will carry Ryan & I through this journey.  Just today I had someone whom I've never meet, FB message me, saying I'm now on her prayer list! That is how the Body of Christ should be working....glad to be part of such a healthy body at UFC
  • My amazing husband-Ryan-who has assured me through this whole process of not only his love for me but for God's love for me.
5. Even more than me being scared, i feel drawn to my Creator, my Savior, my Redeemer!   
  • His Love > my fear
  • Although I don't understand this new path in my life, I know it is His Will to bring me to His glory and likeness.  He knows Ryan and I can handle this and grow closer to Him. 

That is all for tonight, my head hurts ;)